Am I afraid of the dark??? No. Am I afraid of challenges??? No. Am I afraid of speed??? No. Am I afraid of pain??? No. Am I afraid of you??? No. Am I afraid of me/myself??? Yes, I am. There are phantoms in my mind. What? Phantoms in my mind? Ya! There are phantoms in my mind. There are phantoms in my mind who are not afraid to prowl the terrains of my conscience by day or by night. They haunt me as if they have a right on me and my mind is their abode.
Phantoms. Phantoms. Everywhere!!!
Spirits of doubts. Ghouls of irritation. Ghosts of dismay. Mummies of distrust. Witches of betrayals and of course Phantoms of loneliness and despair.
Poking and prying in my brain. Trying to wriggle out answers to the multiple/endless questions that they have to pose. Slashing here. Scathing there. Prodding and clawing everywhere.
Their harried cries and ...
Leave me alone. Please leave me alone. I beg of you all. Please let me enjoy everything as they are : pure and untainted. Let me be normal once again and enjoy with my friends. Please don't trouble me and make me think so much. Please don't bother me and let me rest. Just for a while. Please let me have a deep, sound sleep. Please let me d..
P.S. This post was originally on Yahoo 360 before it closed down and hence has been shifted in here. It was written by me on the 4th of July, 2007
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
As Lonely as ME
How lonely can a person be? Under what circumstances can he be lonely? Can a person be lonely only when he is isolated/deserted/all by himself/alone or is he lonely even when he is in a room full of people or in a crowded market place? Can loneliness' claws grasp/grip a person when he is in a new place surrounded by strangers or can it also encompass him when he is in a familiar place full of people called F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
I am not a great philosopher nor a great thinker nor am I penning down my thoughts to impress anyone nor aiming for the Booker Prize. But these questions have been cropping up in my mind for the past few days and have left me thinking like a mad man. Day in and day out I have been thinking. Thinking. Thinking... The best way that I could stop this was by putting it down on paper. So here I am writing away when the world is sleeping away to glory.
Ya! The topic was LONELINESS. Well! This is a feeling which is worse than most other feelings coz many a times you don't/can't even understand why you are experiencing this feeling. I dont know about others but with me it is true. Most of the times I start feeling lonely all of a sudden and don't even know the cause of my predicament. I start searching for answers but the more I think the deeper I sink into the quicksand called loneliness.
But, the more you think and the deeper you sink, the results/answers become more and more startling. First, you don't believe these answers. You want to reassure yourself by telling that all this is false/trash but you try in vain. Then you start believing in their authenticity but slowly you realise that not only are these true but are facts of life.
YES. Loneliness is a part of life. It is omnipresent and always there surrounding you, waiting/lurking to pounce on you. You just have to allow your thoughts to drift a bit and lo! you realise how very lonely you are in this vast expanse of flora and fauna. It is only for you to realise all this and you will understand that this feeling is always surrounding you...
P.S. This post was originally written by me on 2nd September, 2006. I had to move it in here as Yahoo 360 closed shop.
I am not a great philosopher nor a great thinker nor am I penning down my thoughts to impress anyone nor aiming for the Booker Prize. But these questions have been cropping up in my mind for the past few days and have left me thinking like a mad man. Day in and day out I have been thinking. Thinking. Thinking... The best way that I could stop this was by putting it down on paper. So here I am writing away when the world is sleeping away to glory.
Ya! The topic was LONELINESS. Well! This is a feeling which is worse than most other feelings coz many a times you don't/can't even understand why you are experiencing this feeling. I dont know about others but with me it is true. Most of the times I start feeling lonely all of a sudden and don't even know the cause of my predicament. I start searching for answers but the more I think the deeper I sink into the quicksand called loneliness.
But, the more you think and the deeper you sink, the results/answers become more and more startling. First, you don't believe these answers. You want to reassure yourself by telling that all this is false/trash but you try in vain. Then you start believing in their authenticity but slowly you realise that not only are these true but are facts of life.
YES. Loneliness is a part of life. It is omnipresent and always there surrounding you, waiting/lurking to pounce on you. You just have to allow your thoughts to drift a bit and lo! you realise how very lonely you are in this vast expanse of flora and fauna. It is only for you to realise all this and you will understand that this feeling is always surrounding you...
P.S. This post was originally written by me on 2nd September, 2006. I had to move it in here as Yahoo 360 closed shop.
This one's for God's finest gift to us : Our Moms'
"Mother", this six lettered word is undoubtedly the most comforting and according to me the most 'love-giving' word in the English language. It is so b'coz the very mention of this word fills our heart with joy, doesn't it? Well for me and I have no doubts for all of you this word is the most precious word in your vocabulary. In fact my calling it a word is an insult. It isn't merely a word. It is in fact a source of unending love, undying faith, unrealistic support, unimaginable inspiration, unselfish encouragement and so much more. The words starting with un' will run out but a mother's love for her child, her faith in her child, her support for him/her will never ever end.
I am writing all this on the occassion of my mom's birthday (11th of October) as a tribute not only to my mom but to all mom's. Thank you, all of you, for being there for us when we don't have anyone else to fall back on, when we don't know what to do next, when we think we are lost, when we have lost all hope to redeem a situation and then when you emerge as a pillar of strength, like a light which not only supports us, guides us, encourages us but also teaches us how to deal with the challenges which have been strewn by the Almighty himself in our journey of Life.
You do all this so very unselfishly, never wanting anything in return. I just wonder how you all are so very good. I just wish we could also inculcate this noble trait from you. If we can, then more than half of man's troubles will be over and the Earth will be transformed into Heaven. But let's talk about Utopia later on and not deviate from the topic that is u mom(s').
I can never ever repay you for what you have been doing for me over the years (not that you expect anything). Even though I don't ever bother to thank you mom for whatever you do for me. I know you don't expect it from me but let me take this oppurtunity to thank you for everything that you have done for me.
I will always be grateful to you and am sorry for whatever wrong I might have done. I love you a lot and will continue doing so and will always return to you at the slightest hint of trouble. I love you mom.
Happy Birthday, Maa. Take Care, bestest friend.
P.S. This post was originally written by me on 11th Oct., 2005 which happens to be the birthday of the bestest mom on this whole wide world. I had to move it in here as Yahoo 360 closed down which was where I had started blogging.
I am writing all this on the occassion of my mom's birthday (11th of October) as a tribute not only to my mom but to all mom's. Thank you, all of you, for being there for us when we don't have anyone else to fall back on, when we don't know what to do next, when we think we are lost, when we have lost all hope to redeem a situation and then when you emerge as a pillar of strength, like a light which not only supports us, guides us, encourages us but also teaches us how to deal with the challenges which have been strewn by the Almighty himself in our journey of Life.
You do all this so very unselfishly, never wanting anything in return. I just wonder how you all are so very good. I just wish we could also inculcate this noble trait from you. If we can, then more than half of man's troubles will be over and the Earth will be transformed into Heaven. But let's talk about Utopia later on and not deviate from the topic that is u mom(s').
I can never ever repay you for what you have been doing for me over the years (not that you expect anything). Even though I don't ever bother to thank you mom for whatever you do for me. I know you don't expect it from me but let me take this oppurtunity to thank you for everything that you have done for me.
I will always be grateful to you and am sorry for whatever wrong I might have done. I love you a lot and will continue doing so and will always return to you at the slightest hint of trouble. I love you mom.
Happy Birthday, Maa. Take Care, bestest friend.
P.S. This post was originally written by me on 11th Oct., 2005 which happens to be the birthday of the bestest mom on this whole wide world. I had to move it in here as Yahoo 360 closed down which was where I had started blogging.
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